When someone tells you they have a problem, do not immediately assume that solving it is valuable enough to build a business around.
People have thousands of problems.
Most of them are not urgent enough to spend serious money solving.
Your job is to understand:
Why does this problem matter enough to do something about now?
That question helps you distinguish between:
- something mildly annoying;
- something someone enjoys talking about;
- and something important enough to create a real buying decision.
Let Them Explain First
When you first speak with a potential customer, they may spend several minutes explaining:
- what happened;
- what they have tried;
- what annoys them;
- how the current system works;
- what they think the solution should be;
- and dozens of details that may or may not matter.
Let them talk.
Do not immediately interrupt with your theory.
Do not immediately explain your product.
Do not try to demonstrate that you already understand everything.
Listen.
You are trying to understand how they see the problem.
Once they have explained it, bring the conversation back to the most important question.
Ask:
“Why is this important now?”
Or:
“What changed that made you want to solve this now?”
This is where the useful information often begins.
Why “Now?” Matters
Suppose someone tells you:
“My English pronunciation could definitely be better.”
That sounds like a problem.
But perhaps they have thought that for fifteen years and never done anything about it.
There may be very little urgency.
Now compare:
“I have my final interview for a €90,000 international role in three weeks. In the first interview they asked me to repeat myself several times, and I’m worried it will happen again.”
Same general subject.
Completely different opportunity.
The second person has:
- a specific event;
- a deadline;
- a consequence;
- and a reason to act.
You are not manufacturing urgency.
You are discovering whether urgency already exists.
Keep Asking Why
Once you uncover the first reason, go deeper.
Suppose they say:
“I need to improve before the interview.”
Ask:
“Why does this particular interview matter so much?”
Perhaps:
“It would let me work internationally.”
Then:
“Why is that important?”
Perhaps:
“It would increase my salary by about €25,000 and let me work remotely.”
Now you understand something completely different from:
“This person wants pronunciation lessons.”
The real desired result may involve:
- career progression;
- income;
- freedom;
- confidence;
- and access to a different life.
Pronunciation is only part of the mechanism.
Ask Why They Cannot Simply Wait
A useful question is:
“What happens if you do nothing?”
Or:
“Why not leave this for another six months?”
If the answer is:
“Nothing really.”
that tells you something important.
The problem may not be urgent enough yet.
If the answer is:
“I will probably lose the opportunity.”
that tells you something different.
You can also ask:
- What happens if this is still unsolved next year?
- What has this already cost you?
- What becomes harder if you wait?
- Is there a deadline?
- Who else is affected?
You are trying to understand the cost of inaction.
The cost of inaction is what the customer loses by doing nothing.
It may be:
- money;
- time;
- confidence;
- opportunities;
- customers;
- productivity;
- reputation;
- or reduced options.
Ask Why They Need Help at All
Do not assume they need you.
Ask:
“Could you solve this yourself?”
That may feel like a strange question when you are trying to make a sale.
But the answer is extremely useful.
Perhaps they say:
“Yes, probably, but I have been saying that for two years and never do it.”
Now accountability may be part of the value.
Or:
“I could learn it, but I only have three weeks.”
Now speed matters.
Or:
“I don’t know what I’m doing wrong.”
Now diagnosis matters.
Or:
“I have tried three courses and they were too generic.”
Now personalization matters.
You are discovering why the customer wants help rather than merely information.
Ask Why They Would Choose You
This is particularly important when you are building your first repeatable business.
Ask:
“What made you interested in speaking with me specifically?”
Do not ask this because you need reassurance.
Ask because the answer reveals your positioning.
They might say:
- You understand Portuguese speakers.
- Your explanation in a video made sense.
- You have worked in the same industry.
- You seem less intimidating than traditional teachers.
- You focus on interviews rather than general English.
- Someone they trust recommended you.
- You showed examples of the exact problem they experience.
These answers help you understand what differentiates you in the customer’s mind.
The reason may not be what you expected.
Ask About Cheaper Alternatives
If you are considering a meaningful price, understand why the customer would not simply choose something cheaper.
Ask:
“There are much cheaper ways to work on this. Why not use one of those?”
For pronunciation:
“Why not just watch free YouTube videos?”
“Why not use an inexpensive language app?”
“Why not take ordinary English lessons?”
You are not insulting your own offer.
You are trying to understand the difference the customer values.
They may answer:
“I have no idea which mistakes I personally make.”
That suggests diagnosis.
Or:
“I need feedback while practising the actual interview.”
That suggests personalization.
Or:
“I have already used apps for years.”
That suggests information is not the missing piece.
If the cheap alternative genuinely solves the problem equally well, you should know that too.
Try to Talk Yourself Out of the Sale
A useful attitude is:
Look for reasons this person should not buy.
Ask things like:
- Why not wait?
- Why not solve it yourself?
- Why not buy something cheaper?
- Why not ignore the problem?
- Is the result actually worth the effort?
- Are you sure this is the most important problem to solve?
This may feel backwards.
But it protects both sides.
If you can easily convince the person that they do not need the service, the problem probably was not valuable enough.
Good.
You discovered that before creating an unhappy customer.
But sometimes every alternative creates another reason they want the problem solved.
They explain why:
- waiting is expensive;
- doing it alone has already failed;
- cheaper alternatives are insufficient;
- and the outcome matters enormously.
At that point, you are not manufacturing value.
You are discovering value that was already there.
You Are Not Trying to Create Urgency
This distinction matters.
Bad sales sometimes tries to invent pressure:
“You have to buy today.”
“Your life will be terrible without this.”
“This opportunity disappears forever in ten minutes.”
That is not what you are doing.
You are looking for natural urgency.
Natural urgency already exists in the customer’s situation.
Examples:
- an interview in three weeks;
- a product launching next month;
- an important presentation;
- a customer threatening to leave;
- an employee wasting ten hours every week;
- a legal deadline;
- or a problem that becomes more expensive every month.
If there is no genuine reason to act now, do not pretend there is.
By the End, You Should Understand Five Things
Before you design or price a serious offer, you should understand:
1. Why the problem matters
What real consequence does it create?
2. Why it matters now
What changed? What creates urgency?
3. What happens if nothing changes
What is the cost of inaction?
4. Why the obvious alternatives are insufficient
Why not wait, do it themselves, or use something cheaper?
5. Why they believe you might help
What creates trust or makes your approach relevant?
When you understand those five things, you can begin to understand the value of the result.
Without them, you are mostly guessing.
Example
A potential customer says:
“I want to improve my English pronunciation.”
Weak discovery stops there and starts selling lessons.
Better discovery continues:
“Why is this something you want to work on now?”
“I’m applying for international roles.”
“What happens if you leave it alone?”
“I’ve already had interviewers misunderstand me, and I think it’s affecting my interviews.”
“Why not practise with YouTube videos?”
“I’ve tried. I can hear the teacher, but I can’t tell what I personally do wrong.”
“Why work with someone rather than continuing alone?”
“I have interviews starting next month and don’t want to spend six months figuring this out.”
“What happens if this works extremely well?”
“I could realistically move from about €45,000 to €70,000 and work internationally.”
Now you understand the opportunity.
The customer is not merely shopping for pronunciation lessons.
They have:
- an urgent career event;
- a meaningful financial upside;
- evidence that the problem has already affected them;
- unsuccessful alternatives;
- and a reason to seek personalized help.
That is the information you need before deciding what service to offer and what an appropriate price might be.
The Rule
When someone says they want help, do not immediately ask:
“What should I sell them?”
First ask:
“Why does solving this matter enough for them to act?”
Keep asking until you understand the real consequence, urgency, alternatives, and desired result.
Sometimes the answer will tell you that there is no good business opportunity.
Sometimes it will reveal that the problem is far more valuable than you initially understood.
Both outcomes are useful.
The purpose of the conversation is not to talk someone into buying.
It is to understand whether there is a sufficiently important problem for a valuable exchange to exist.